photographer + writer + producer

Thoughts

Beyond Small Talk: on making REAL friends.

Friends. It's become such an ambiguous term. 

The definition shifts depending  on the context. Everyone in your fraternity could be your "friend", this girl you met a couple times at those house parties could be your "friend", and the person sitting next to you in your science lecture could be your"friend". But the problem is we forget there is a context, and we start fooling ourselves into thinking these "friends" are real friendships.

As graduation in May was getting nearer, I was becoming more and more aware of the various, superficial friendships in my life that went no further than some lunches here and there, maybe a night out, maybe a conversation about why I chose to major in Theatre. But I wanted more. I want our minds to connect, for us to understand each other's goals, for us to put time aside for each other, for us to support each other's endeavors and for us to be able to share a bottle of wine talking about life  or nothing in particular on a Friday night without the regret of missing out on anything.

Real friends. That's the kind of friend I want and the kind of friend I strive to be. 

So now I'm going to be that friend: I'll want to get to know you, I'll want to send time with you (and won't stop asking you to hang until we do), I'll want to hear about your passions, and I'll encourage you to fight against the status quo (because I know it can be a bitch). 

And the best part? It's working. I'm creating deeper connections with people who have the same visions, passions and goals as I do and  let me tell you, there's no other high these days that beats a good conversation that goes beyond just small talk. 

So who are my real friends? I'm still making them, with new and old relationships.

Friendships can grow forever, and the way I see it, there's no limit to how real a friendship can be.

 

Shabnam FerdowsiComment