Identity Crisis

It’s awfully weird.

I eat a tangerine and I think “Hm, I remember eating these in Italy”

I drink some tea and I think “This is much better than the teabags in Italy”

I eat some rice and I think “I eat as much rice in Iran that I ate pasta in Italy”

I consider drinking some coffee and I think “NO. DONT. Italy’s is better” then when i  do end up drinking it I think “Well. yup. Italy’s was better”

It all goes back to Italy…

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But I’m in iran. And thank goodness I’m not speaking English and surrounded by America, or else ItalySickness would be the death of me.

I’m reminded why I keep coming back every year. Something hit me the first few days and maybe the summer after I graduate I won’t stay for so long, maybe the usual 6 weeks? Anyhow, I realized reason #1-infinity I come here is to see my family. my desire to see more has somehow vanished, and for now, I don’t feel like making a documentary. lol.

I come here to se my cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles because I can and they can’t. However, I’m not so much myself here. In the sense that 1. it’s hard to express my excitement for what I want to do with my life and expect the same excitement back. and 2. I lose my chillness. All of sudden there’s a whole hord of people I need to confer with before I do anything, mostly out of my fear of hurting someone’s feelings… it’s weird. 

So yeah. It hink that’s all the reflecting I’ve been doing.

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I can’t stop thinking about Onelise and Mario. It’s been 10 days. I leave for LA in 5 days. school starts in 14. 

what

the 

heck

#LIFE